From a biblical perspective, marriage serves as the foundation to precede and provide the context for raising children. It reflects God’s plan for families to flourish, emphasizing stability, commitment, and spiritual unity.
The Bible says in Genesis 2:24 that marriage is a sacred union: “So a man will leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they will become one flesh.” This verse highlights the creation of a new family unit, distinct and prioritized before kids come along. God designed marriage as a covenant that reflects Christ’s relationship with the Church (Ephesians 5:25-32). Although children are a blessing, they are not the foundation.
God tells Adam and Eve to “be fruitful and multiply” in Genesis 1:28, a directive for married couples. Children should be born within a well established marriage. In Malachi 2:15, God looks for “godly offspring” from marriage, so if you have a stable marriage as the , God-honoring relationship if you want to raise kids like Him.
Getting married before kids makes you more emotionally stable and spiritually stable. Ephesians 6:4 tells us to “bring [our children] up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.” A united couple, based on faith and commitment, is the best way to accomplish this task. The kids need to see love, sacrifice, and fidelity in a strong marriage. It’s a responsibility that requires parental unity and consistency, rooted in a godly marriage, to train a child.
Marriage prevents relationship breakdown. When kids come before marriage, parents’ relationships can get strained, since their focus gets shifted to raising the kids instead of nurturing the spousal bond. It can lead to instability, which Scripture warns against. Paul stresses in 1 Corinthians 7:3-5 that spouses have a mutual obligation, emphasizing the importance of maintaining intimacy and unity despite your differences.
In Psalm 127:3, children are described as “a heritage from the Lord.” Children thrive in a structured and solid marriage with God as its cornerstone. Many studies have shown that children who come from stable, two-parent families do better emotionally and socially. God’s wisdom in ordering marriage first is spiritual and practical whether you are a Christian or not.
In keeping with God’s covenant design, as a means to create stable families, and raise godly kids, the Bible puts marriage before children because when you have a stable marriage that prioritizes the marriage to reflect Christ’s love, give their kids a safe environment, and fulfill God’s purpose for family by prioritizing marriage.
